As I watched her lying in the bed, stirring from sleep, happy that he had arrived home and giving him a slight smile—tears welled up in my eyes and I let out a whimper as he crawled on top of her and began relentlessly pummeling her face and shattering her self-esteem in the process. Yes, I’m talking about “Surviving Compton: Dre, Suge and Me.”
As I sat with my husband watching the Lifetime Biopic of Michel’le Toussaint, I thought, we’d each like to believe that we are far removed from domestic violence and that it doesn’t affect us or anyone we know. However, Michel’le is like many women we all know. I remember being 8 years old scrambling to the kitchen phone trying to dial 911 on the rotary dial without being detected because my step-father was in the master bedroom beating my Mom and her screams for her life woke me from my sleep.
I also had two friends who were victims of domestic violence. The first friend refused to stop dating a man who was cheating on her and ended up punched in the face (just like Michel’le) except she had her jaw wired shut. The other friend was intelligent, beautiful and very capable of caring for herself. She got married, moved out of state and went through the process of being emotionally, mentally, physically and financially abused. When we rescued her from New York (she fled there) she had nearly lost her voice because she had been screaming for her life and ended up with scabs on her vocal chords.
Many times when celebrities like Michel’le tell their stories people offer no sympathy. Why? They believe that because you have access to money, you can just GO. But pain is pain and abuse is abuse and where do you go with no support system? Where do you go when your Mother/Grandmother raise you telling you that “abuse” is just something that men do and you just have to try to be better? No amount of money will ever prepare you to wrap your mind around that. Big houses, national tours, wild pool parties with all the trimmings can still leave you feeling like there is no escape—even with a brand new birthday car parked outside.
I’ve heard people say, “I thought she was smarter than that!” “I thought she was too intelligent to let that happen to her!” What many forget is that abusers systematically brainwash their victims. They don’t prey on the “weak” they find someone, anyone and BREAK them. They don’t just meet you and pounce, they meet you, romance you, find your weak spots (we all have them) and play on them to the point that you’ll doubt what happened actually happened to you. And love, where do you put the emotions and feelings you have for them? Nobody tells you what to do with those. You may say, “Just stop loving.” But my thoughts are that just like drug addiction, many put up with it (the abuse) hoping that the pre-drug addicted (pre-abuse) person will show up again and the world will be roses.
As I watched “Surviving Compton: Dre, Suge and Me,” I’m certain Michel’le was waiting for Andre (Dr. Dre) Young to come to his senses—but abuse only makes sense to the abuser, nobody else. They have faulty reasoning. That still leaves me with several questions:
Why didn’t anybody DO anything to help Michel’le? I mean, call the police, hide her from him—give him a taste of his own medicine?
High, drunk, tired from making beats in the studio or not, how could anybody sit in a room while a woman was being punched in the face and doubled over from Dr. Dre’s fist to her stomach and do nothing?
When chronicling the rise of N.W.A. in the movie “Straight Outta Compton” my question is how do you do such damage to a person’s mind, heart and soul and simply erase them from the history of it all as an inconsequential mishap?
If could say anything to the scoffers and those who are trampling all over Michel’le’s story using three letter, four letter and five letters words to describe her it would be, “How do you with a clear conscious re-victimize a victim simply because you don’t want the image that you hold of Dr. Dre to be shattered?” Dr. Dre was on parole from battery. Michel’le wasn’t his only encounter with a fist to a face (just ask Dee Barnes). He was sentenced to several months in jail and ordered to pay a fine in 1995. Many times we don’t believe or fully understand something until it hits close to home. Let’s stop idolizing those who abuse, let’s pray for Michel’le, let’s eradicate domestic violence and let’s hope that it never has to come that close to home for you to actually believe it “can” happen. I’m done. I’ve got a boycott to join.
I love teaching, encouraging and motivating people to do what they were called to do. I’m excited about the ability that people have to create products, ideas, invent things and then turn that in to cash that they can take straight to the back. I’m so happy when my clients find success, after all that’s what it’s all about. But the success I want to talk about today hits very close to home–my hubby.
I remember when he was instructed to write a book. He thought and even said, “You’re the writer in the family.” But like I’ve been saying since 1999, “Everyone has a book in them!” That means that you and everybody else out there knows something that is “uniquely you” and even though you may not flow when it comes to writing and your words may not have the cadence of poetry–you can still write a book.
So, he bought a MacBook Air last weekend (or the week before) and downloaded Microsoft Office, and before you know it, he was in the zone and didn’t come up except to eat, sleep and go to church on Sunday. The thing I love is that he was so determined to complete what he had started. I’m so proud of him and now we’re diligently rebuilding his website: TheBeAManBook.com so that you can plug into him, his blog and of course purchase his book. If you need motivation or coaching to get your book published contact me at SixFigureYourPassion.com. Stay tuned. His launch party is next!
Oh and the cat was just hanging out in an empty box back there the entire time for moral support.
It had to be a Wednesday prayer call where I first shared Don’t Grind, Don’t Hustle, Flow With God. It wasn’t new to me, the concept that is. I never felt like I fit in with those who are always talking about hustling and grinding. That wasn’t me. When I put God’s plan into action there is an ease and a flow about it that it almost seems effortless. It’s not rough, pushy or aggressive or even abrasive as the definition describes. So when He said to create these tees I was excited. I really wanted to get people on board with the mindset of “flowing with God.”
In the process I learned 3 things:
1. When you flow with God you aren’t trying to figure out how to make things happen. You leave that up to Him and He’s all right with taking on the task. Some people are so used to everything requiring “hard work” so this is more difficult for them to get, but not impossible.
2. Grinding is the equivalent of BUSY and we all know that “busy” isn’t necessarily productivity. When I flow with God I find myself doing things that are purposeful and bring me to the end goal–whatever He says that is. That’s how you f-l-o-w.
3. Hustling while frequently used in slang terms to mean: “to earn one’s living by illicit or unethical means” – I had to realize that’s so NOT me. And you may be saying, “That’s not what I mean when I say “hustle”, but words are important and I refuse to even put it in the atmosphere that I’m hustling anything or anybody. That makes it easier again to do “only” what He says and leave it up to Him to bring forth the increase.
Are you grinding? Are you hustling? I urge you today to change your vocabulary.
FLOW WITH GOD instead.
YOU CAN ORDER A TEE HERE. THEY’RE AVAILABLE IN SMALL-3X.
When the Lord spoke through an Apostle (Apostle Candace N. Ford) and told me that I’d be hosting live conferences, immediately I cringed and then I braced myself to walk in obedience. I had already hosted my first virtual business conference and that was right up my alley because there was nowhere to travel to and I didn’t have to leave the comfort of my home. But God wasn’t satisfied with that. He needed me to leave my comfort zone to take me where He desired for me to go. So I launched my first LIVE conference in April 2015. We just wrapped up the 3rd Annual Grow Your Dreams Conference in April, 2016 which has now been renamed the Grow Your Dreams Prophetic Business Conference and I tell you this: WHEN YOU ARE OBEDIENT THEY WILL COME.
Now of course I’m talking about a conference, but the same rules apply when you’re writing a book or launching a business too. If He is telling you to do it, you better believe that He is going to pique the attention of the people He is requiring to tap into whatever it is that you are doing. I didn’t end up on The Today Show all by myself. Honestly, it’s not for us to figure out, we just have to flow with God. And that’s what I did. And what was the outcome? Lives were transformed, people were infused and ignited in their purpose and they can’t stop talking about the events and are making plans to do it again each year. Why? Because when you are obedient, God handles all the extras.
What is God urging you to trust Him with today? The steady growth of your business? The increased sales of your book? The launch of your idea, product or service? How to reach your target audience? We serve a God of miracles and yes He could totally allow you to explode and become well-known overnight. However, oftentimes, there are things that He will need for you/us to do. Our job is to get quiet, sit at His feet and get those instructions and then diligently carry them out. Once you do that, He is responsible for the growth and success of what you’ve obediently planted. I urge you today, don’t stand watching barren ground, obediently plant something and then watch for His word to testify in your life.
JOIN US FOR THE NEXT CONFERENCE HERE.
True story: I kept trying to post this article on 7 Powerful Habits of A Self Made Millionaire on my fan page and for some reason Facebook wouldn’t pull up the image that Success.com has on the article. It kept pulling up “MY” picture instead. I started to get a bit annoyed after trying to post it 3 or 4 times and then I heard Holy Spirit whisper to me: LOOK. I looked at the title of the article and my picture and made the connection of me and “millionaire”. All I could say is, “I receive it Father!”
Here’s what else I learned:
1. God wants me to be RICH. Not just where money is concerned, but He wants me to have a rich spiritual life and a rich body with my health not caving in to the common ailments in the land. All I have to do to receive it is to know what His word says, and learn how to activate what His word says. He wants this for you too!
2. He will give us a plan to get wealth if we put down so much of the “stuff” that is really clutter and keeps us too busy to realize how little we’re accomplishing and instead dedicate time to communing with Him. In His presence is where you’ll find the best secrets and download your most prized products and services too. I know I have gotten inventions and business ideas just sitting at His feet. They were falling like ripe apples from trees.
3. He assists me so that I can assist others. He really does. My business is about helping others birth their books, businesses, products and ideas, so, if I didn’t have anyone to help, sure He could still steer me into another lane, but my perfect fit is helping people, whether it’s through books, products or services I love sharing what I know.
Check out the habits I was trying to share via this link.
It’s April, 2016 and I finally got it. It took me awhile–years even. I was torn between teaching clients how to birth their dreams and give life to the things they’ve always hoped for which includes non-profits for women and children, clothing lines, fragrance lines, inventions, publishing companies and other things, but then it became a struggle to keep up with my fashion blog. Blah! Then one evening while I was watching television it came like a flash: I wasn’t limited to just teaching about earning passive streams of income through Six Figure Your Passion™ but I could actually just introduce “you” the readers to the lifestyle of entrepreneurship. This could and will include the behind the scenes prep work to launching a product, events I’ve hosted and just my life and how different its become since I started plugging in to what I know and stop taking shorts when it comes to earning what I’m worth. Trust me, although I still love fashion, this isn’t about showing off, moreso it’s about allowing people a sneak peek and encouraging them with the fact that ANYBODY can do what I do and have what I have if they are dedicated enough. Forgive me in advance if you initially began following me here for shoes, designer fashions and lots of giveaways. You may still get some of that, but my vision is calling and I must fulfill it. Stay tuned! I have a LOT to share. You can also connect with my Facebook page here.
Yes, I’m back!
I’ve been cultivating a FAVORITE THINGS list for the past 4-5 years and this year is no exception. I normally share things that I fell in love with this past year and recommend to others who are looking for UNIQUE gifts for their friends and family members or even Secret Santa (you know, for those who participate in that sort of thing). So without further adieu, here are my TOP 10 FAVORITE THINGS of 2015 . . .
Do you remember when I told you how much I loved TAJJ cosmetic’s lipsticks? Not just the vibrant and glorious shades, but the consistency and the creaminess of the products and the fact that I’ve never used a product quite like it before? I even made a YouTube video about it [TAJJ Cosmetics Deja and Chic Lipstick] I’m not the type to knock other brands, but I will say that’s why TAJJ is on my favorite things list! Grab a couple of shade, heck grab all the shades. You won’t be disappointed! At $15 these are perfect for self-gifting! | TAJJCosmetics.com
Everyone who knows me knows that I’m a clutch lover and if they don’t they should. This here is a long standing product that’s been on my list for years. Well, at least 2 years. Love Cortnie was a blogger who created her own brand and has been featured in popular magazines including LUCKY to name just one. I love the spotted pony hair, it’s so soft and supple and it’s the perfect size to go anywhere you want to take it. From $90-160 this is something that she is certain to thank you for again and again. | LoveCortnie.com
Day Three Bath & Body has always been one of my favorite brands. They have so many delish products. This milk bath is a must have. They help soothe, itchy dry skin, soften dry skin and smooth bumpy, irritated skin. They are filled with Milk (cleopatra knew) and a combination of botanicals, like Lavender, Rose petals, Calendula flowers, chamomile and more! For $7.50 each you can splurge on several combinations. | ShopDayThree.
Every single year a book makes my list and this year is no different. Prayer is my weapon of choice and when Liela Marie Fuller sent me a copy of “Don’t Stop Knocking, Don’t Stop Seeking, Don’t Stop Praying, Don’t Stop Believing” I knew it had to be on the list. Even if you don’t know how to pray or get a prayer through for that matter this prayer journal will train you to write it down, attach a scripture and wait on the Lord and it even gives you a spot to write down the revelation. I love this! You’ll want to give it to everyone you love! | Amazon.com
I am a total cuff fan so it’s only natural that I featured this cuff again even though I already featured it in our His and Hers Valentine’s Day Gift List. I just ADORE So Excessive’s “Love Collection” of cuffs and it definitely fits the season. The collection is available in gold, rose gold and silver and you can choose from the open heart to the word “Love” spelled out. From $54-58 this is something that she is certain to thank you for again and again. Get brownie points guys! | SoExcessive.com
Deborah Lippman is a celebrity and fashion manicurist who has designed nail polishes for stars such as Lady Gaga, Scarlett Johansson, Kim Kardashian, Julia Roberts and Gwyneth Paltrow. Her shades range from nudes to glittery goodness. I love this shade called Candy Shop that is glittery in a bubble gum base shade. The other shade is Mermaid’s Dream and definitely catches the essence of the sea with flecks of sparkle. From $7.50 to $18.00 per bottle, these premium nail lacquers are perfect for the girly girl in your life. Get them here and here.
As a natural girl I’m always looking for something creative to do with my hair and a cute way to tie it up and keep it out of my face. The adorable array of products by Silk Wraps are excellent for this purpose. I love the reversible pieces like the tie pictured here. If you’ve got a natural girl in your life she’ll love this product, just log on and pick out a pattern. There’s a polkadot tie too that’ll make you swoon. She has an array of sleep caps and other hair protection accessories too. Browse and shop. I guarantee you’ll love it. | SilkyWraps.com
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Every six figure earner should know how to make corn bread like this.
I’m not one of those who had the luxury of having my grandmother’s cornbread recipe passed down to me. I didn’t even graduate to making cornbread that wasn’t from a box until just a few years ago. I tried Martha Stewart’s recipe, because well her pancake recipe is OUTSTANDING, but her cornbread recipe didn’t do it for me. But when I stumbled upon the Betty Crocker recipe–I hit payday! I had to double the recipe below so that it could have the thickness that I like my cornbread to have. Here you go:
Butter to grease pan
1/4 cup butter or margarine (1/2 stick)
1 cup milk
1 large egg
1 1/4 cups yellow, white or blue cornmeal
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 Heat the oven to 400°F. Spray the bottom and sides of an 8-inch square pan or 9-inch round cake pan with the cooking spray.
2 In a 1-quart saucepan, heat the butter over low heat until melted.
3 In a large bowl, beat the melted butter, milk and egg with a fork or wire whisk until well mixed. Add the cornmeal, flour, sugar, baking powder and salt all at once; stir just until the flour is moistened (batter will be lumpy). Pour batter into the pan; use a rubber spatula to scrape batter from bowl. Spread batter evenly in pan and smooth top of batter.
4 Bake 20 to 25 minutes or until golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Serve warm.
Sooooo yummy. If you try it I want to know!
Germanee Gerald, the creator of The Prada-G, blog is an assistant merchandiser at Old Navy and a stylist in the San Francisco Bay area. Joelle Purifoy, the creator of The Colors of Joelle blog, is a Master’s of Fashion Design candidate at SCAD and a merchandising intern at SPANX, Inc. in Atlanta. Brittany Curry, is a full time coordinator and model at a local boutique in Washington, DC.
All three of these fashionista’s target Millennials, whether in the workforce or in the hallowed halls of higher education. They all share their own distinct personal style, paired with current trends to inspire other women.
Get inspired, and learn how to rock their nine fashion must-haves by visiting these three brown beauties’ blogs:
Germanee Gerald: http://www.thepradag.com
Joelle Purifoy: http://www.thecolorsofjoelle.com
Brittany Curry: http://www.onethousandbc.com
It’s Fall, it’s time to throw on a pair of leggings and pair them with cute boots all day, all night, every weekend, go to the movies, go to dinner, put on a blazer and go to work and so on. Here’s my quick and easy round-up that won’t break the bank from some brands I totally love. And remember, when you buy quality (not brands that construct their products with rubber soles) they last and can be resoled season after season.
I love the fringe of the Arctic Burnished Boot in Camel. They come in other colors too but there’s just something about the camel colored suede and fall leaves turning colors that does it for me. Yes!
GET IT HERE.
These Jeopardy Mesh Booties are on the money. You can’t wear them in the cold but they are sure on and poppin’ for the in between weather.
GET IT HERE.
The cut outs on the Acomplise booties are cute. I love the mauvish purple color too!
GET IT HERE.
I can always count on Jessica Simpson for affordability. I love this shoe boot. It slides on and has an elastic enclosure for a comfortable fit. Gorge!
GET IT HERE.